![]() ![]() ![]() You find yourself googling canine hair loss remedies and rubbing amla oil on their bald patches. The fur thins out all over their body, ending in a bald butt like a baboon. It’s not just the housecoats that make them resemble little old men: they develop greyhound pattern baldness. If you can see a dog in a housecoat without laughing, you’re a stronger person than me. The rule is: “If you need a jacket, so does he.” In a cold house, they start to shiver - so they need to wear pyjamas. Greyhounds have so little body fat that they can’t keep warm. My former self would be so ashamed of me today. I used to think that putting dogs in clothes was just for Paris Hilton. It’s pretty insulting for the people still in the room. My greyhound cries whenever someone he likes leaves the room. It’s very disconcerting - a little too human. While people are very afraid of big dogs in muzzles, they are no longer afraid when that dog weighs about three stone and wears a jacket. “People will take one look at him and cross the road. “He’s a huge, hip-height black dog with a muzzle on,” I thought. The first time I took mine to the park and he saw a squirrel, someone opened their front door to see who was getting murdered. Greyhounds don’t bark, they scream - and the sound is uncannily like a woman. ![]() If they’re not the Black Dog ghost of folklore, then they’re descended from the banshee. They regularly sleep upside down with their legs in the air, like a canine version of Gregor Samsa in Kafka’s Metamorphosis. Mine has such a thousand-yard stare that we’ve nicknamed him ‘The Philosopher’. They’re tall, skeletal and eerily silent - the final touch to any haunted stately home. If greyhounds weren’t so mellow, Heathcliff would have had one. ![]() What exactly he looks like is up for debate, but it goes without saying that Rover and Lucky are only distant relations. Friends have defined my greyhound as an indoor horse, a pet deer, a miniature giraffe, a giant mouse and a dachshund on stilts. If you see a greyhound lying curled up - or worse, see one get up from lying down - you’ll realise that they have at least eight.Ĭlassification is a struggle. You’ll only see four with the naked eye, but wait for the glitch in the matrix. They try hard, bless them, but mimicking dog behaviour is still a work in progress. They are long, spindly, big-eyed things with tails like antennae. They’re definitely not dogs.Ī greyhound is a creature that someone held at both ends and stretched. I’m pretty sure that greyhounds landed on earth in the middle of an electrical storm.īefore you take one of these sweet-natured space oddities into your home, here are seven things you need to know. People will try to convince you otherwise - but don’t fall for it. A sprig of fresh rosemary and a slice of fresh grapefruit make these cocktails look gorgeous, but they’re SO easy to make.They’re not real dogs. Grapefruit juice, vodka, and homemade rosemary simple syrup (YUM) are mixed together and served over crushed ice. That’s why I LOVE that this rosemary greyhound is made in batch in advance! You can mix it all up in a pitcher, give it a stir, and have guests serve themselves and pour into ice-filled glasses. I love a good cocktail, but I’m not a fan of making them individually, especially when I’m hosting a party and want to spend time with my friends and family. Literally, just flip the package over and serve on the tray they come with! Genius!Īlso, you have to have a cocktail to pair with these delicious platters. The “flip and serve” aspect of the tray was also super appealing. The crackers are kept separate from the other ingredients so they were super crunchy and fresh tasting. The dried cranberries and the dark chocolate pieces were such a fun touch that I never would have thought to add to a meat and cheese board myself.Īnd the packaging was super convenient. I love that each platter comes with five different ingredients. Between the Calabrese Salame & Genoa Salame platter and the Genoa Salame & Prosciutto platter… I couldn’t choose! So I got both. I picked up both of these platters at my local H-E-B in the prepared foods section. ![]()
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